Matt Schatt Game Show - SNL

CARMEN, AND THIS IS MY HUSBAND MATT. >> ALL RIGHT. CARMEN AND HER COUSIN MATT. OKAY. >> NO, NO. MATT'S MY HUSBAND. >> I'M SORRY. I HAVE A BAD EAR FOR ACCENTS. SOUNDS LIKE YOU SAID THAT MATT'S YOUR HUSBAND. >> I DID. WE'RE MARRIED. >> UH-HUH. >> TO EACH OTHER? >> YEPERONI. >> OKAY. SO, LET ME JUST CLARIFY WHAT'S GOING ON HERE. SO YOU, WHO ARE YOU,

ARE MARRIED TO HE, WHO IS HIM? >> YEP. WE ARE MR. AND MRS. MATTHEW PATRICK SCHATT. >> YOUR NAME IS MATT PAT SCHATT? >> YES, SIR. IS THAT OKAY? >> NOT REALLY. NOW, I GOT TO ASK, WHY ARE YOU ON THE SHOW WHEN YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY EXTREMELY WEALTHY? >> OH, NO, I AM NOT WEALTHY. >> WELL, THEN, WHY IS SHE WITH YOU? >> ISN'T IT OBVIOUS?

>> NO! OH, MAN, I GOT TO CALM DOWN. I GOTS TO CALM DOWN. IF YOU'RE NOT RICH, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING? >> I DANCE WITH THE SAN FRANCISCO BALLET, AND MATT WORKS IN THE FOOD INDUSTRY. >> OH, SO YOU'RE A CHEF? >> NO. I'M A TASTE TESTER AT PURINA DOG CHOW. >> HE TRIES NEW DOG FOODS TO TELL THEM IF IT'S TOO, LIKE,

SPICY. YOU KNOW, BECAUSE THE DOGS CAN TALK. >> SO YOU EAT DOG FOOD FOR MONEY? >> SOME DAY, HOPEFULLY. IT'S VOLUNTEER RIGHT NOW, BUT FINGERS CROSSED IT TURNS INTO A PAID GIG SOON. >> YOU EAT THE DOG FOOD FOR FREE? OH, MY GOD. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT'S GOING ON. THIS DUDE HAS OBVIOUSLY GOT THE BADDEST BITCH I EVER SEEN, AND WHAT IS

HAPPENING? SORRY, EVERYBODY. I JUST HAD A STROKE. ALL RIGHT. LET'S GET BACK TO IT. JUST TRY TO FIGURE OUT HOW THIS ABSOLUTE DIME IS MARRIED TO MATT SCHATT. OH, BETH, YOU GOT AN ANSWER? >> I THINK I DO. HE OBVIOUSLY GAVE HER A KIDNEY AND SAVED HER LIFE. >> HE DIDN'T GIVE ME A KIDNEY. >> ROB, CHANCE TO STEAL. >> HE'S A HANGING EIGHT BUT A

STANDING 12? >> NO. AND FYI, HE'S HANGING FIVE AND WHEN HE STANDS IT'S A FOUR. >> SO WHEN HE GETS EXCITED IT GETS SMALLER? >> THAT'S RIGHT. ONE OF THOSE THINGS. >> I'M BUZZING IN ON THIS ONE. HERE'S WHAT I THINK, SHE HYPNOTIZED. >> YOU'RE ALL SOUNDING CRAZY. LOOK AT MY HUSBAND. I THINK IT'S OBVIOUS WHY I'M WITH HIM. >> THE JUDGES SAY NO. >> I'M

SORRY. CAN WE PLAY THE GAME NOW OR -- >> OF COURSE, OF COURSE. I'M SORRY. MATT AND CARMEN, YOU WON THE COIN TOSS BACKSTAGE, SO THE FIRST QUESTION GOES TO YOU. >> OH, MY GOSH. I'M SO NERVOUS. I'M LIKE ALREADY SWEATING. ONE SECOND. >> FREEZE. ZOOM IN ON THIS. >> WHAT? >> WHAT IN THE HECK? MATT PAT SCHATT HAS GOT A GRIFFIN NIPPLES. LOOK AT ALL

OF THESE. EWW. >> YEAH. EVERY COUPLE OF YEARS, A NEW ONE POPS UP. JUST ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE THINGS. >> BABE, PUT YOUR SHIRT DOWN. I'M GOING TO GET TOO EXCITED. >> BUT WHY, THOUGH? I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT. LET'S JUST TAKE A BREAK WHILE I HAVE ANOTHER STROKE. BECAUSE I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT'S GOING ON. SHE BAD. RIGHT? SHE BAD.